The limbo of trial separations

When partners separate, especially after being together for a long time, unpleasant symptoms may arise. One might experience irritability, low mood, increased or decreased appetite, poor or excessive sleep, low motivation, and/or generally feeling anxious. Your body and mind are trying to process what's happening. Whatever the reason for the separation, it's time to catch your breathe and reflect on what the relationship was like. Had trouble been brewing for a while? Did either of you use the silent treatment? Was there avoidance of hard topics? How did the relationship feel (stressful, tense, confusing, awful)? Was there a sense of disconnectedness? It takes two to fight for a relationship; if one is unwilling then you might consider that perhaps you've reached the beginning of the end.

My advice to a person going through this is to focus on health first; do your best to eat healthy, get on a sleep pattern (see your health professional if you need help) and get some exercise. You will need a clear healthy mind, especially now. When you are a bit stronger find a safe place to unpack what's going on inside your mind; this is a crucial step. It may be with a counsellor or in the company of people you trust and value. What do you really want? What do you deserve? Remember that we are rarely as powerless as we feel.

#trialseparation

#relationshipadvice