I haven't met a human without some sort of wall around them, if you're breathing, you have them. We all know these as "defense mechanisms", and while many are quick to point these out, label them, and get busy tearing them down, I am not. Nope. Not even a little. The thing is, I'm fascinated by their well-crafted, complex and intricate nature. These things don't suddenly come up like pesky dandelions, they were fed and nurtured with great care over years, sometimes decades. They've allowed us to keep breathing, they've kept us in motion of sorts, and they've helped us seem and feel "normal".
I have a stalwart, unwavering, and absolute belief in our desire to live fully. From where I sit, the most beautiful part is this: that which built the wall is wise. It's clever, it's knowing and it's brilliant! It's your own personal guru that can discern. It can. It does. It’s always in action. It knows when you need to stand guard. It knows when you are in the company of good people who serve your well-being; it lets you scale the wall from time to time to check others for their substance, be in their company for a bit, then jump back over. The real goal is for you to be with others freely and happily, but your guru won't let you do that callously. That said, make no mistake, it also knows when to tear down part of the wall, to exclusively allow the right person in.
So, if you’ve ever asked yourself questions like, why can’t I get close to that someone? Why can’t I let them in? Sometimes the answer is simple: you or they, don’t really want to. Somewhere in there is a guru saying no. This is why the it's-not-you-it's-me sayers move on and commit to others. So please, value yourself enough to be with the person with whom wall-free is mutually desired and desirable. This too will have some challenges, but you'll want to face them together.
