It takes a village to "raise" ourselves

While this saying is used for children, it can also be used to describe an individual, our very own village of one. Let me explain. As you’ve gleaned from previous posts, there are more pieces to us than we realize: we have our wise wall builder that keeps us safe, our bullshit meter that keeps us real, and our sense of self that is constantly evolving. When we keep all these parts, our parts in good shape through self-reflection, we raise, nay heighten ourselves to stand taller. Perhaps we even stand at our tallest yet. Dang we’re amazing!

Now our village of one is a social being that resides within another village. Much like our inner pieces, the quality of our external villagers is equally as important. No matter how well we grow in solitude, we need the support and kindness of others because we don't know what we don't know. We don't know what we overlook or avoid, or what else exists outside our purview. We can be blinded by cravings or wants that don't serve us, and we may not have the strength or courage to turn ourselves around.

So, have a really good look at your outer village and it's dwellers. If you're in a relationship, by virtue of emotional proximity, your mate has the greatest influence of all. This “closeness” can sometimes blur your ability to distinguish between your heart and your mind; that just happens. Hence, this relationship will either strengthen or weaken your village of one. A solid and loving partner will challenge your avoidance, encourage you to see what you can't on your own, and will be the solid force to lean on while you re-orient yourself. Sadly, an apathetic or unloving partner will leave you standing alone, perhaps when you are most in need, and blame you for your predicament.

The future is yours!

The beautiful part is that as an adult, you get to pick your villagers. You get to push out bullies who make you feel less, and bar the thieves who rob you of your goodness. You get to send them all away with a final full arm wave. Oh yes you can, and many in worse circumstances than yours, have. If these trouble makers are in your home and won't go, you get to slam the door as you leave, and screech your tires, Rockford style, right out of their harmful lives. Endless choices indeed!

So if your outer village needs culling or an outright overhaul, today is a great day to set things in motion. Handcraft your village while listening to your discerning soul. Keep only what you want, and invite other great ones like you in. Fill it, fill it right to the very top with those who inspire you, stand behind you, walk with you, or if need be, pull you forward. There are great, wonderful, and fantastic folks out there who would be honoured to be one of your villagers! Are you short a villager or two? I'm right here.

elenasherwood1@gmail.com